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The Machine
September 24th, 1894 Tomorrow is the day that I finally put my engineering abilities to good use. In the morning, I shall be leaving to assist in Hammond's meat processing factory! It seems that one of the engineers employed at the facility has fallen ill, and I have been chosen to take his place. Finally, not only shall I be able to provide for my children, but I'll be able to do the work my heart has yearned to do for so many years! I've spent so much time studying mechanics, learning the intricacies of machinery… and now, I'll be able to use my hands on such beautiful mechanisms! I only hope, as wicked as it may sound, that the man I'm serving as substitution for shall stay under the weather for a while longer. I wish only to provide for my family, should he make his recovery soon, I may not be able to find another job so easily. September 25th, 1894 Today has been quite the day! When I arrived at the factory, I was sent to help in the reparations of one of the conveyor belts. It must've taken me a good five hours, but I was able to get it working once again, and on my own, nonetheless! I've never had such fun working in all of my life. To finally be able to grasp the cold, metal handle of a wrench gave me unexplainable joy. I can hardly wait to go back tomorrow! Perhaps, if I keep up my good work, Hammond will let me take home a bit of steak for my children and I! I mustn't get ahead of myself, though. I suppose I shouldn't get my hopes too high, lest I be disappointed later. Oh, well. I'll be off to bed now, I have to rise early for work again tomorrow. September 29th, 1894 This has been a great week! I've made countless repairs, installed a few parts here and there, and now I've finally received a proper payment. It's not much, but it'll put bread on the table. I only wish Meredith were here to celebrate with us. Oh, how I and the children miss her. I suppose she'd be proud of me now, working, feeding the children… I've done good. I'm proud of myself, too. October 1st, 1894 Another good day at the factory. I'm a bit worried, though. Jeremy, the chap I've been filling in for, showed up today. He said that the doctor told him he'd be well within a few days, and that he should be "relieving me of duty" soon enough. Bah! Relief. What could possibly be relieving about losing my job again?! I'll spend days upon days begging for food, doing anything I can for just a few coins… it's just not fair! This is my dream job, and here Jeremy comes, trying to snatch it away from me! I mustn't let him have it. Perhaps Hammond will give me a permanent position, if I asked nicely enough. After all, I've been doing such a marvelous job here! October 2nd, 1894 It seems I may have asked for the position a bit prematurely. Upon requesting that I might stay under his employment permanently, Hammond promptly stood up and escorted me out of his office. He said that such an idea was ridiculous, quite angrily I might add. I suppose he's right; I'm just an amateur engineer. Jeremy has much more training. But, I tried so hard… maybe there's still a way. I suppose I'll find out soon enough. The good news is, my children have been much happier. Little Jacob and Thomas have been doing so much better in their schoolwork, and they seem much happier, too. I must find a way to keep my job. I simply must! October 4th, 1894 Jeremy came in to work again today. He informed me that he would be retaking his position this coming Monday. I tried to hide my frustration and disappointment, but I can't help feeling that he may have detected it. He seemed almost… fearful. But, of what? I couldn't have looked THAT angry, I tried my best to conceal my emotions. I think I'll talk to him tomorrow with more of a grin, so as to remove any "misconceptions" about how I felt today. He said that he'd be coming in for a few hours to check up on all the machinery, particularly the pork processing machine. Hammond had asked him to examine the blades used to skewer and cut open the pigs on the conveyer belt; apparently they've gone somewhat dull. I think I'll try to talk to him there. October 5th, 1894 I can't believe what I did today. I've never felt such unbelievable… emotion. Jeremy and I were talking while he was checking the pork processing machine. I tried to tell him how much I had enjoyed working here, and how much I would miss the experience. He smirked, and said, "Heh, I suppose Monday's gonna be a bloody terrible day for you, then." I was furious, and my anger got the best of me. As he leaned over the conveyer belt to examine the machine, I thrusted him upon it, next to the carcass of a swine. Before he could stand back up and retaliate, one of the harpoon-like blades penetrated his back as it mechanically dropped down to skewer what was usually pork. Poor Jeremy was carried down the rest of the way to the meat grinder. I've never experienced such a rush before in my entire life. October 8th, 1894 No one suspected a thing at work today! I arrived to receive my "final payment," and Hammond, upon noticing that Jeremy had failed to come in today, told me that I would be able to work until he returned, if I desired to do so. Naturally I said yes, and the day went on as normal. Well, almost normal. All day, I felt as if my heart had been pumping blood twice as fast, and that I was almost like… almost like a machine. October 11th, 1894 I was finally offered a permanent position at the factory. "If he isn't going to explain his absence, then perhaps Jeremy doesn't deserve the right to return at all," Hammond told me. I've never been so happy before in my life. Meredith would be such a proud wife right now! December 24th, 1894 The last few months have brought me nothing but pure joy. I've even earned myself a promotion - I'm now the head engineer of the facility! I can even stay late if I want to, after everyone else has gone home, so that I can tinker away at the beautiful machines to my heart's content! Tomorrow is Christmas, so it seems I have to take the day off. Oh, well. Perhaps I'll sneak in to the factory later tonight and snatch a bit of pork for the children. December 25th, 1894 I mustn't stay writing for long, I've got a dinner to return to with Thomas and Jacob! The pork smells delicious. I wish Meredith were here to enjoy it with us. I miss her so much… December 26th, 1894 Hammond brought me in to his office today. He said that he knew I stole from him. Apparently he had seen me coming out of the factory through his bedroom window across the street the other night. I hope he loved the machines as much as I do, because it seems Hammond's last memory was experiencing them puncture his fragile, weak, little skull. He can't fire me if he's in a million little ground-up bits, can he? Meredith would be so proud of me! December 29th, 1894 None of the other workers seemed to notice Hammond's… disappearance. Not until today, when they knocked angrily on his locked office door for their paychecks. The six of them almost beat down the door! I couldn't let them know what happened. If they broke in, they would notice his absence, and then surely my misdeeds would be discovered! Fortunately for me, old Hammond kept a pistol in his desk. But I couldn't just leave their bodies lying around to rot. Such a waste! I pulled each of them to the pork processing machine and fed them to its glorious, wonderful, beautiful, metal mouth. My children surely won't be able to tell the difference at dinner. December 31st, 1894 I was on a walk yesterday evening, and as I passed the factory I noticed quite a few constables on the property. It seems that they had somehow discovered that the workers had been used to feed the beautiful machine. It won't be long until they discover that I am its servant, and I can't let them take me away from my great metal master! Jacob and Thomas are with you now, my love. And soon, I, too, shall meet the glorious fate of my coworkers, my employer, and my children. I'm going to offer myself to the great metal jaws of this beautiful creation; it has been an honor serving in its palace. I'm coming home, Meredith. I'll be with you soon. Category:Diary/Journal Category:Mental Illness Category:Dismemberment